The 9 Best Things to Say to Someone Who Has Lost Weight Health by Sarah Elizabeth Richards on 7/13/2016 Photo by Imani Clovis We’re all guilty of getting this wrong sometimes. PDF and Image of all of the questions: Here is the 350 Good questions to ask PDF. Researchers also use clinical trials to look at other aspects of care, such as improving the quality of life for people with chronic illnesses. There's nothing worse than having a boring, stifling conversation… just as there's nothing better than truly getting to know someone and learning something unique about them. Another SMART goal would be to replace soda with water every day for the next month, rather than a goal to give up all sugar. Be prepared to refer patients to a specialist who can help them decide if weight-loss surgery is an option for them. “I didn’t just lose weight to look good in clothes. You can’t expect someone to receive a compliment graciously if you can’t take one yourself. You think you’re being nice by acknowledging someone’s weight loss, only to receive an awkward response of “I’m still the same as before, but thanks anyway.” Worse, you’re accused of pointing out just how fat the person used to be before slimming down. However, Rubaum-Keller issues this warning: Do not talk about your challenges in keeping off the weight unless you’re sharing a strategy that worked for you. However, it is not a diagnostic tool, and clinicians should follow up to determine a patient’s health risk. 7 Group Questions So what questions can we ask to get some discussion flowing in a mental health group? For Stein, the worst compliment is hearing: “You’ve lost soooo much weight! Continued 2. For some, weight loss is a long process that requires changing your habits and mindset. If a patient currently is not interested in or ready to commit to a weight-loss plan, advise him or her to avoid further weight gain and continue to treat other risk factors or comorbid conditions. Research has shown that patients prefer the terms “weight” (first) and “BMI” (second) when talking about obesity, and dislike the terms “fatness,” “excess fat,” and “obesity.” Preferred and non-preferred terms generally were the same across social and economic factors. Weight gain is common when someone is ill, experiencing stress, has lost a loved one, or their body has simply changed. We’re all guilty of getting this wrong sometimes. Our society has wired us to comment on weight loss as a good thing — something to be congratulated on. When you see patients for follow-up visits, note their progress. The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends offering or referring patients with obesity for intensive, multicomponent, behavioral interventions.5 Lifestyle programs and counseling might include a thorough plan that uses behavior change strategies for at least 6 months to increase physical activity and improve healthy eating. [5] U.S. Preventive Services Task force, Obesity in Adults: Screening and Management https://www.uspreventiveservicestaskforce.org/Page/Document/UpdateSummaryFinal/obesity-in-adults-screening-and-management. “Think about what you’re saying: ‘I can’t believe you did this!’” That’s not exactly empowering now, is it? Words will never hurt me? To someone with an eating disorder, however, … And in case you prefer an image of all questions. “For people who aren’t sure they can keep the weight off, all that attention is anxiety-provoking because they worry what people will think if they slip up,” she says. Jeff Stein, a Daily Burn 365 member, got a lesson in the perils of compliment-giving when he exclaimed to a co-worker upon her return from vacation: “You look great! Many patients may benefit from a referral to a registered dietitian or structured weight-loss program. Effects of moderate and subsequent progressive weight loss on metabolic function and adipose tissue biology in humans with obesity. Save them for people you know well. Perhaps you really can’t believe your friend shed 20 pounds. Keep them coming. Some evidence-based, commercial weight-loss programs may also be helpful. Compliment big picture goals. Patients may be more open if they feel respected. As we gain coaching experience, we inevitably compile (mentally or officially) a list of go-to questions that we find spur key insights, self-reflection and buy in throughout our work with clients. Don't become the "food police." Never ask a lady when is she due, unless and until she has confirmed her pregnancy. that are no one else's business. Would you greet a friend with “Wow! As a primary care clinician, you are in an ideal position to talk with adult patients about weight loss. “I eat healthier now than ever before.”, 2. Powell, Kimberly. Jones, how are you feeling about your weight at this time?”, “I’d like to learn more about your eating habits. How to be supportive of friends or family members who are beginning a weight loss plan. Resources to help patients set and stick with goals. 1. RELATED: The One Thing That Finally Helped Me Lose Weight. Measuring your patients’ body mass index (BMI) regularly may help you identify who may benefit from weight-loss information and counseling. I did it for my health,” says Israel, mother to a 4-year-old. Some medications patients use for psychiatric disorders, diabetes, or other conditions may contribute to weight gain or difficulty losing weight. “What’s problematic is that everyone views it differently, and it’s hard to figure out which people want compliments,” explains Irene Rubaum-Keller, Los Angeles-based psychotherapist and author of Foodaholic: The Seven Stages to Permanent Weight Loss, who has worked with patients who’ve lost significant amounts of weight over the last 20 years. Before asking patients if they wish to discuss their weight, mention the health risks associated with overweight and obesity. Worried you might be complimenting someone too much? Extra weight may put people at risk for developing type 2 diabetes, heart disease, kidney disease, stroke, and certain cancers. Approach the subject of weight management if your patients have. What kinds of foods and beverages do you eat and drink on a typical day?”, “What does ‘healthy eating’ mean to you?”, “Do you eat only when you’re hungry, or do you eat for other reasons as well, such as feeling stressed or bored?”, “When is the amount of food and beverages you eat and drink likely to change (for example, when you eat out or at work or family celebrations)?”, “How do you think keeping a journal will help you track how much you eat, drink, and exercise?”, “When would be the best time of day or evening for you to be active?”, “What kinds of activities do you enjoy? “Bask in the moment. Seated aerobics? Still, temper your enthusiasm. The NIDDK translates and disseminates research findings to increase knowledge and understanding about health and disease among patients, health professionals, and the public. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has approved several new devices for obesity treatment that cause less weight loss than bariatric surgery. A list of questions you can use to generate conversations in the ESL/EFL classroom. [3] Lydecker JA, Galbraith K, Ivezaj V, et. But remember, your time with your doctor is limited, so be sure to arrive at your appointment ready to ask the questions about menopause that are important to … For patients with BMIs ≥35, you don’t need to measure waist circumference. They’ve lost all belief in themselves, and feel like nothing they do is right or good enough. That includes other weight-related words, such as ‘skinny.’ The adjective made 40-year-old Ilyssa Israel cringe after she lost 50 pounds last year. “Don’t worry if you sound like a broken record,” says Rubaum-Keller. Having patients start with just two or three actions or changes may make them seem less overwhelming and more realistic. Improving health numbers, along with praise, may help motivate patients and boost self-esteem. “You want to appear like a friend who understands and is trying to be helpful,” she says. Do not ask anyone if they are pregnant, or comment that someone has lost weight. 2013;37:118–128. Whats your “self-sabotagers” name? Bariatric surgery may be the next step for patients who continue to have severe obesity after trying lifestyle changes to lose weight‚ especially if they have one or more comorbid conditions linked to obesity. Create your own mutual admiration society by looking your commenter directly in the eye and saying “thank you” like you mean it. For example, patients who think they are at a normal weight within their culture might respond better to a clinician’s suggestions for maintaining, rather than losing, weight.4. RELATED: 12 Things Nobody Told Me About Losing Weight. 8. The National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases (NIDDK) and other components of the National Institutes of Health (NIH) conduct and support research into many diseases and conditions. You never know the reason for weight gain or loss, and could be left in an uncomfortable “Be thankful that you have people offering you the gift of kindness and positivity,” says Russo. In our diet-obsessed culture, it’s easy to assume that all weight loss is welcome. Thank them for caring enough about your efforts to change your life for good.” Then gush away! Whether it's a potential romantic partner, a business associate, or someone who might become a friend, using interesting questions shows that you care enough to learn more about the person. He has Talk with patients about setting SMART goals for losing weight, or goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-sensitive. Ask the Dietitian® is a website with weight, calorie, meal planning calculator tools and frequently asked questions (FAQs) on over 100 nutrition topics. In fact, suddenly stopping your raves can be upsetting to those who have gotten used to regular ego boosts. Ask patients about their eating and drinking patterns (PDF, 384 KB) . My weight has been constant for the last, like, 10 years since I stopped growing, but people are always asking if I’ve lost weight. Rude questions aren’t always obvious. Ditch the disbelief. If you've answered yes to any of the above questions, you know how frustrating and boring it can be to ask and answer the same questions over and over again. You should never ask people about their family planning, their weight or these other 21 sensitive topics. Share your own experience. I knew I was that fat, but I don’t want to hear about it,” she says. Don’t disguise it as concern, either. Consider asking your patients the following types of questions: Partner with your patients to develop a plan tailored to their individual needs and readiness for change. 2016;23(4):591–601. For example, suggest a goal of walking 30 minutes a day 3 days a week for 2 months, rather than a more general goal of becoming more active. "50 Questions to Ask Relatives About Family History." The NIDDK would like to thank:Rebecca Puhl, Deputy Director, Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity, Professor, Department of Human Development and Family Studies, University of Connecticut, Weight Management for Health Professionals, Talking With Patients About Weight Loss: Tips for Primary Care Providers, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (NIDDK), part of the National Institutes of Health. Overcoming challenges to obesity counseling: suggestions for the primary care provider. © 2021 Daily Burn, Inc. Here are nine tips on how to artfully deliver a compliment without offending (almost) anyone. Using terms that patients prefer may improve patient communication and care.3 You may want to say something like this: Also, be alert and sensitive to cultural differences your patients may have about weight, favorite foods, social norms and practices, and related issues. “I’ve been more selective about who I give compliments to,” says Stein, 46, a freelance writer from Astoria, Queens, who’s now lost 20 pounds himself. Why talk with your adult patients about their weight? Other options to help patients lose weight are included in the practice guideline for managing overweight and obesity in adults from the American Heart Association, American College of Cardiology, and The Obesity Society. You look so much better!” Even if it’s true, he says, “I don’t want to think that I was walking around for a long time looking like hell.”. Some patients with severe obesity—a BMI ≥40 kg/m2 or ≥35 kg/m2 with comorbid conditions—may benefit from information on bariatric surgery or other weight-loss surgery. If you notice someone in your life has lost weight, ask them how they’re genuinely doing. A new study has found that the popular intermittent fasting diet, which is when someone only eats during a certain period of time, doesn't make a significant difference to weight loss compared to eating three meals a day. Israel never tires of being told she looks fabulous, but what really makes her glow is when people acknowledge why she did the hard work to shed 50 pounds. Some people crave recognition of their hard work, yet others see your “Way to go!” as a source of pressure. Have you gained weight… Also, discuss setbacks and make suggestions for overcoming challenges. About 70 percent of American adults are overweight or have obesity. Content produced by the NIDDK is carefully reviewed by NIDDK scientists and other experts. To talk about physical activity, start with the health benefits of being active, even for short periods of time, on a regular basis. “I knew that if I didn’t lose it, I would set myself up for health problems later.”, 4. A child lost a life; the parents are grief-stricken; and–honestly–it’s just going to suck sometimes to be the friend or family member of someone going through this. Leave out the word “weight.” Ask patients if you could talk with them about their general health, including weight. “It can be a double-edged sword. This content is provided as a service of the National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases Do you feel more confident with these questions to ask people? Review your patients’ medications and consider substituting others that may be weight-neutral or cause weight loss where medically appropriate. Clinical trials are part of clinical research and at the heart of all medical advances. In an effort to convince his brother-in-law to workout, one writer asked him 5 questions to get to the bottom of his weight loss motivation. health risks associated with overweight and obesity, Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans, practice guideline for managing overweight and obesity in adults, Help patients understand the stages of change, several new devices for obesity treatment, Find out if clinical trials are right for you, https://www.uspreventiveservicestaskforce.org/Page/Document/UpdateSummaryFinal/obesity-in-adults-screening-and-management, Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans, 2nd edition, NIDDK’s Diabetes Discoveries and Practice Blog for health care professionals, National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases, current cutpoints for overweight (a BMI between 25 and 29.9 kg/m, current cutpoints for obesity (BMI ≥30 kg/m, waist size of more than 35 inches for women or 40 inches for men, "Mr. Jones, could we talk about your weight today?” or, “Mr. First of all, you may want to start with a focus for your discussion – ask someone to share a story, experience, or step in “It implies being sickly and not taking care of yourself,” says Israel, who recently started her own personal assistant business in Charlotte, North Carolina. The International Journal of Clinical Practice. Depending on … Patients who are not yet ready to attempt weight loss may still benefit from talking with their primary care clinician about healthy eating and regular physical activity. "I'd ask him how much he weighs, and then I'd shed him! Research shows that even a modest weight loss of 5 percent can result in health benefits.1, The rate of overweight and obesity in the United States, and related health risks, make the role of the primary care clinician an important one. International Journal of Obesity. “Don’t say, ‘I can’t believe how good you look!’” says Rubaum-Keller. Although many weight-loss patients are open about their experiences, there are still some questions that are simply insensitive or inappropriate to ask, whether or not you realize it. Weight-loss medications may be an option for people with health problems related to excess weight. Finally, good questions ask clients to honestly assess their commitment, to learn from previous attempts, and to venture realistic goals. We've all been asked rude questions that are no one else's business. To make his compliments go the distance, Stein focuses on acknowledging whether someone looks “fit and healthy.” “I don’t want to assign too much value to being thin or fat, especially if they gain back a few pounds,” he says. Ask questions that move clients forward instead of those that seek to justify what went wrong. 5. Open the discussion about weight in a respectful and nonjudgmental way. In addition, avoid questions related to appearance. Help patients understand the stages of change and how the stages relate to making lifestyle changes, such as weight loss, that may improve health. It’s an unfair burden for the friends and family, and even if you do everything right there are going to be times when the other person still gets upset due to the grief. 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